3 BAD RELATIONSHIP HABITS STEALING JOY FROM YOUR MARRIAGE

Does it feel like marital bliss is slipping through your fingers, no matter what you try? A few bad relationship habits might be to blame.

Maybe you’ve caught yourself saying:

• “My spouse doesn’t make me happy anymore.”
• “I’m not happy in my marriage.”
• “Don’t I deserve to be happy?”

If you’ve been there—or even thought it—you’re not alone.

Unhappiness is an epidemic. It seems to creep into every area of life: work, home, and even relationships. While some struggles are unavoidable, they aren’t always the root cause.

So what’s really behind all this unhappiness? It might surprise you to learn that your bad relationship habits could be the culprit.

Even couples who seem to “have it all” can feel empty if they fall prey to these common issues.

Let’s dig into three bad relationship habits that could be stealing your joy and what you can do to reclaim it for your marriage.

Bad Relationship Habit #1: Comparison

All you have to do is open up your favorite social media app, and you’ll find plenty of stuff you seem to be falling short on. Everyone else seems happier, more successful, or more in love.

Don’t compare someone else’s highlight reel to your cutting room floor!

And don’t get caught up in somebody else’s story just because it looks “better” than yours. Often times it’s not better. It’s just different.

How to Break the Habit:

• Set boundaries with social media.
• Create a list of your achievements as a couple.
• Process feelings of comparison or inferiority with a marriage coach or counselor.

Bad Relationship Habit #2: Ingratitude

Do you spend more time being thankful for what you do have or being bitter about what you don’t?

Ingratitude is a sneaky thief, often fueled by comparison.

But here’s the good news: gratitude is a powerful antidote.

How to Break the Habit:

Write a gratitude list. Here’s a start:

• Someone loves you enough to choose to do life with you again today.
• You’re alive and breathing.
• You have a computer or smartphone (which puts you in the top 1% of the world’s wealth).

When you train yourself to notice the good, joy becomes easier to find.

Bad Relationship Habit #3: Unrealistic Expectations

It’s tempting to expect your spouse, your marriage, or even your circumstances to make you happy. But no person or thing can do that.

Even those with the best intentions are bound to let you down at times. Life will throw curveballs.

If you’re expecting a perfect spouse or a perfect situation to grant you happiness, you’re in for a rude awakening.

No one and nothing is perfect, but that’s okay.

The beauty of life comes from how you improvise, adapt, and overcome.

Give yourself (and your spouse) grace to keep trying new things and investigating what brings you joy.

How to Break the Habit:

• Practice communicating your needs and expectations clearly.
• Let go of the pressure to have it all figured out.
• Focus on your spouse’s unique gifts and abilities, rather than their flaws.

Reclaim Joy in Your Marriage

Breaking these bad relationship habits isn’t easy, but it’s worth it. A joyful marriage doesn’t just happen—it’s built through intention, gratitude, and grace.

Start small. Choose one area to work on today, and don’t hesitate to get help if you need it. Whether it’s marriage coaching, highly-rated resources, or community support, you don’t have to do this alone.

You can reclaim your joy and happiness!