Movies are a common date night activity, even in marriage. It’s no wonder why. Movies can transport us to new worlds and immerse us in exciting stories. 


Movies can make their way into our everyday lives. 

Take today, May 4th, for instance. 

As you go about your day, you’ll likely hear at least a few people commemorate May 4th in Star Wars fashion by saying, “May the Fourth be with you!” 

There are plenty of life (and marriage) lessons that you can learn from movies. 

Let’s dive into some of the best marriage lessons you can learn from movies, as well as the three steps you can take to build recreational intimacy with a movie date night.

Building Your Recreational Intimacy with Movies

First things first, recreational intimacy is all about the fun you and your spouse have together. It includes trying new things, having fun adventures, and making lasting memories. 

If you’re not having fun, you’re not doing it right! 

For some couples, watching movies can become a stale date. Perhaps you’ve lost the fun and joy of picking a new movie. Or you both end up looking at your phones instead of watching the film together. 

But there’s a reason movie dates are so popular! It’s an excellent opportunity to strengthen recreational intimacy, plus physical, emotional, and even sexual intimacy.

Whether you go to a theater or watch a movie at home, you can make the time meaningful and memorable. 

Important Marriage Lessons From Movies

If you look hard enough, you can learn important lessons about life and marriage from almost any movie. Below are three crucial lessons from popular movies that can change the way you approach marriage.

1. Be Committed (Star Wars)

Since it’s May the Fourth, let’s start with a Star Wars marriage lesson. 

In The Empire Strikes Back, Yoda teaches Luke Skywalker the importance of commitment by saying, “Do or do not. There is no try.” 

The same is true in marriage. 

When your officiant asked you and your spouse your vows, you didn’t respond with “I’ll try.” You and your spouse said, “I do.” 

Marriage is about continuing to say “I do” to your spouse and putting in the effort to stand by your commitment. 

2. Friendship is Key (Up

The opening sequence of the 2009 Disney/Pixar film Up is a tear-jerker. 

Within only a few minutes, it shows the highs and lows of Carl and Ellie’s marriage. They enjoy married life together: reading, going on picnics, working together, and saving up for their dreams. 

They also face tragedies: infertility or child loss, medical emergencies, natural disasters, and more.

Throughout all of this, Carl and Ellie display a deep friendship. They enjoy being with each other, and they do things to perk each other up during dark and trying times. 

Their friendship lasts throughout their marriage. And it is a good reminder about the importance of maintaining a friendship with your spouse.

3. Love is a Choice (The Vow)

In the 2012 film The Vow, Leo tries desperately to get his wife to fall back in love with him after she loses her memory. 

This film depicts the importance of putting in the effort to romance your spouse and choosing to love them. 

There may be times when the feeling of love doesn’t come easily to you. In those moments, you have to choose to love. 

You must make a conscious, daily choice to be intentional and take action to keep your marriage strong. 

How to Have the Perfect Movie Date Night

Movies can move you and make you grateful for what you have. They can also remind you of the things you take for granted. 

A great way to build intimacy with your spouse is by watching a movie that shows you how special your marriage is.

To get the most out of your movie date night, follow these three steps: 

1. Plan Your Movie Date

Be intentional about every aspect of your date. You can both plan the date together, or you could take turns planning. 

Decide when and where you’ll watch a movie. Will it be at home, a theater, or a drive-in? 

Next, find a movie that will encourage you in your marriage. It might be a cheesy romantic comedy that reminds you of how it felt to fall in love. Or you may choose a movie where a couple overcomes extreme obstacles. 

Don’t forget to plan any snacks or drinks that would make your date extra special. If your spouse has a favorite candy, stop by the store so that they can enjoy it while you watch the movie. 

2. Be Present On Your Movie Date

When the time for your movie date comes, the two of you need to be present. This means no distractions. 

Put away your phones, drop the kids off with a relative, and focus on each other. 

Be aware of ways you can engage your 6 Pillars of Intimacy® during your movie date night. 

For example, loving touches can boost physical intimacy. Getting excited about this new experience and thinking of creative ways to make it memorable can build recreational intimacy. Intentional romance (and perhaps some fun after the movie) can strengthen sexual intimacy. 

3. Debrief the Movie

Movies are an art form. So you and your spouse might have completely different interpretations of what the film means. 

When your movie is over, take some time to talk about it. How did it impact you? What did you learn? Are there lessons you can apply to your marriage? 

Even debriefing a simple movie can give you insight into your spouse’s dreams or ambitions. You might learn something new about them. 

These conversations can deepen your emotional intimacy and help you feel closer and more connected as a couple. 

Make All Your Dates Great

Need help coming up with new date ideas to keep your recreational intimacy thriving? Download the Date Night Done Right Guide to get ideas and examples of how to create memorable experiences that bring you and your spouse closer together.

This guide will help you build a routine of dating into your marriage through prompts and ideas.

Being intentional and creative about dating in your marriage is a critical success factor in an extraordinary marriage. Don’t leave it up to chance. Get your copy of the Date Night Done Right Guide today.

Watch the video below to rekindle the spark and restore the connection in your marriage today!

In the 6 Pillars of Intimacy®, you will discover secrets that have transformed countless marriages. Its ideas are simple, practical, and powerful. You’ll be inspired to look at your marriage through a new lens and be encouraged by its commonsense approach.

Alisa and Tony DiLorenzo's proven approach to building intimacy in marriage will help you experience deeper and richer levels of intimacy with your spouse – starting today. Click HERE to get your copy today!

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