“I want a boring sex life, said no one ever.” —Alisa DiLorenzo
…And yet, that is exactly what you may have ended up with.
Oh, it wasn’t intentional, but the road to sexual boredom is paved in a steady downgrade.
Maybe it was just something you enjoyed so much together, it became your go to.
Maybe there were so many other things during the course of your married life that required your full attention, that your sex life got the scraps of your creativity.
Or maybe you had a bad experience together in trying something new so you figured you’d better stay in your lane instead of being let down again.
Or maybe it was a “I’m so tired, baby. Can we just make it quick?” that led to “Shhhh, the kids will hear.”
That led to “I’m sore from the gym. Can you be on top again?” that lead to…. That lead to…
No matter what “maybe” led to it, now there’s no “maybe” about it. You’re in sexual purgatory.
“Hold on a second.”, you shout from your comfortable and replicable sex life, “at least we’re better than those sad souls a bit lower than us on the sexual ladder. At least we’re doing something!”
True. You can justify it, ‘cause, hey, at least it’s happenin’.
Yet, there is still a sexual heaven you always used to dream of. Where you were both super skinny, flexible, creative, insatiable, and talked a lot after.
If that’s you, if you want to “level up” and bring that heaven down to the earth you find yourself on, then try these few things to escape the rut of sexual boredom.
Let Fun Back Into the Bedroom
That’s right. Get out the locker marked “Our fun sex life.” Turn the combination lock to the right to “Silliness.” Rotate it back left to “Laughter.” And finish the combo by rolling back right to “Costumes”.
Grab the attitude contained within and join with it, hand in hand, and skip that sucker back into your bedroom.
Maybe even grab the twins named, “Deep sigh of resignation” and “Obligatory Coitous” by the ear and usher them into the now unoccupied time-out locker. Put the lock back on and leave them there for a half decade or so.
Joking mostly aside…
What if your bedroom was no longer a place of sexual boredom, routine, and obligation but a haven of fun and satisfaction?
Would you want to spend more time there?
Moving swiftly along.
Try It. Then Try It Again
Variety is the spice of life, and if your sex life were Thai food, would it even register a “2” on the spicy scale?
Maybe it’s time you “repurposed” the laundry room.
Sometimes those same positions you sentenced to the bench seasons ago, need to be put back in the game and given some hands on coaching.
You never know, you might find your next go to position that you like so much that you’ll have to be on high alert to not make it your next rut maker!
A seven days of sex challenge is a great canvas to begin your exploration on.
Remember, just because it doesn’t work once, doesn’t mean it’s not worth another shot.
Think of the first date you took your spouse on. What if she didn’t give you another try after that debacle?
Where would your sexual boredom be then?
Once is OK but twice is nice!
Play a Game Where Everybody Wins
No matter if you’re competitive or not, games are a great way to drop your walls and explore a little bit.
Whichever game you pick is great, the key is you play it with your spouse so that you break out of your sexual boredom together.
Husbands, just remember, it’s polite to let the ladies go first, and no matter the final score, they win. 😉
There ya go. Jet fuel to get out of that boring ‘ol sex ditch.
Just think if you’re having this much fun in your sex life, what’s the rest of your marriage going to be like.