Your bedroom should be your space. It should be a retreat; a sanctuary from the stresses of the world. It’s also the space for you and your spouse to have those romantic moments together. 


Your bedroom is important.

Ideally, your bedroom is the place where the two of you sleep, unwind, cuddle, connect emotionally, and have sex. And yet, is it set up so you can experience this?

When you first said “I do,” you likely couldn’t get enough of your spouse. Your bedroom likely wasn’t filled with electronics, kids’ toys, laundry, and other distracting items. When you were together, you’d grab a hold of each other and enjoy every minute you had in your bedroom without the clutter, baby monitors, or distractions.

Over time, a lot of couples’ bedrooms become the catch-all for everyone’s stuff. The passion you had for one another in the early years has faded with the distractions all around you. Your messy bedroom has now put a damper on those romantic moments.

It’s time to turn that messy bedroom into a sanctuary that revives the passion and desire in your marriage.

Simplify the Bedroom

It may have been a while since you’ve had sex, and yet it’s still easy to remember that it can get pretty wild in the most passionate moments. No one wants to be in the midst of making love only to knock off the items piled up on a nearby nightstand. These items and others can be distractions.

To enjoy these intimate moments, you should declutter your room. Try to have decor that is simple and minimalistic. Get rid of clutter, while also considering reducing items such as books, figurines, and pictures on the wall.

Unplug the Electronics

Phones, the television, tablets, and computers in your bedroom can be detrimental to your marriage. Why? Because they’re a distraction. How often do you start watching TV or get online to check your email and completely zone out?

Research shows that “basking in the glow of a TV, phone, tablet, or computer screen for as little as 1 hour before bedtime is enough to upset your circadian rhythm, delaying sleep – and it may increase risk of disease.” Need another reason to unplug the electronics? A new study of 523 couples found that “a TV in the bedroom decreases sexual desire by about 50%.”

Get Clothes Out of the Way

Laundry piles up quickly. Nothing can kill the mood faster than walking into your room and seeing piles everywhere. And then, getting your feet tangled in clean, or dirty, clothes as you make your way to your spouse can send you over the edge.

Can you say mood killer and fight starter? Declutter this area by investing in some good laundry baskets or organizers and use them. Make sure to place dirty clothes entirely out of your bedroom by putting the clothes organizer in an adjoining bathroom, closet, or cabinet. 

Put the Kids’ Stuff in its Place

Toys, bottles, monitors, playpens, diapers, clothes, more toys, and other kid items are distractions. These may be in multiple places around your bedroom, and the mental chatter about them in your room is taking you away from sexually connecting with your spouse.

It’s time to take back your space by moving all the kids’ stuff back to their rooms or other places in your home.

Make Your Bed

It’s easy to come up with a number of excuses about why the two of you don’t need to make your bed. Come to think of it, you’re the only two who are going to see your messy bed. However, if you want to make your bedroom a place for great sex, you have to set the tone after you’ve slept in it for the next time you get into it. All you need is a couple minutes to straighten out the bottom and top sheets and comforter, then fluff the pillows.

Your sexual intimacy is an important part of your marriage. It connects you with your spouse and ensures that you are more than just roommates. A messy room can wreak havoc on your love life, so it’s important to take action to declutter your room in order; making it a sanctuary where you can escape the world.

It’s time to declutter and eliminate the mess in your bedroom and start focusing on each other!

Watch the video below to rekindle the spark and restore the connection in your marriage today!

In the 6 Pillars of Intimacy®, you will discover secrets that have transformed countless marriages. Its ideas are simple, practical, and powerful. You’ll be inspired to look at your marriage through a new lens and be encouraged by its commonsense approach.

Alisa and Tony DiLorenzo's proven approach to building intimacy in marriage will help you experience deeper and richer levels of intimacy with your spouse – starting today. Click HERE to get your copy today!

Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are “affiliate links.” This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, we will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, we only recommend products or services we use personally and believe will add value to our readers. We are disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

Medical Disclaimer: The content of this article & website is provided for general informational purposes only and is not intended as, nor should it be considered a substitute for, professional medical advice. Do not use the information on this website for diagnosing or treating any medical or health condition. If you have or suspect you have a medical problem, promptly contact your professional healthcare provider.