“Create an atmosphere in which anything is possible.” —Raymond Kelly


Think back to the last time the two of you had sex…

What was the mood like? Romantic? Whimsical? Lighthearted? The truth is what things looked like the day you first had sex might be different than what things look like now when you have sex. 

This is an area of sexual intimacy that can easily be overlooked in your marriage, yet it is so important. Mood matters.

That’s because it’s an intentional action. It shows forethought. 

You may have set the mood in the past. The two of you would do this with lighting (dimmer switch, salt lamp, candles), maybe play music, break out the massage oils, and maybe even talk sexy to each other well before you even got between the sheets. 

Years later, it may be a look across the bed and a half-hearted “hey wanna have sex?” Then you get up, lock the door, and hope for the best.

What you need to remember is that even in the hustle and bustle of life, there is still a deep need inside each of you to feel desired. That’s why setting the mood is more about what you are able to give your spouse and less about what you are going to get. 

So stop for a moment and step out of a complacency mindset. You can do that by working on your sexual intimacy; which can be accomplished by extending your emotional intimacy. It’s time to raise the bar on how you set the mood for sex. 

Take time to create that atmosphere for the two of you to connect emotionally, physically, and sexually. Resist the “same old, same old, just a different day” rhythm you may have fallen into.

No matter how you do it, get intentional! It’s time to make your spouse feel like they are the most important person in your world.

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