“The more connections you and your lover make, not just between your bodies, but between your minds, your hearts and your souls, the more you will strengthen the fabric of your relationship and the more real moments you will experience together.” —Barbara De Angelis

connection after sex

If you’ve ever watched a romantic movie scene or read a romance novel, you may have noticed that after the couple has sex, there is a period of physical connection. You know those moments; laying in each other’s arms, just being in the moment together.

However, is it that way for real-life couples too? Can you really find yourselves, lounging in bed talking? Maybe falling asleep in each other’s arms? Is it possible for you to be completely unaware or unconcerned about all the bodily fluids or a possible UTI?

That depends on a few things.

First, it depends on the couple. What do you both want to happen when it comes to building a connection after sex? It is also dependent on the season you are in at that moment. For most, it’s how you navigate those factors, taking into consideration what works best for you. 

While there is nothing wrong with simply cleaning up and getting back to life, some may feel it’s in those movements after sex that you can strengthen your connection. Cuddling, conversation, sleep, and sometimes even more sex, are on the agenda for many. Each is a great way to strengthen your connection after sex.

You have an opportunity to strengthen your connection after sex if you look for ways to make that happen. When you focus on one of the 6 Pillars of Intimacy it can create a base to enhance the others, the 6 Pillars are intertwined. When focusing on one pillar of intimacy, say the sexual pillar, this can lead to stronger connection in the physical and emotional pillars.

You know you want more physical and emotional connection. And yet the practicality can sometimes get in the way. That’s why it’s great to have clear expectations of what your connection after sex looks like. 

It’s when the two of you are clear about your connection after sex that you are going to strengthen your sexual intimacy. 

Remember… you are not having sex in a made-up Hollywood studio or in the pages of a romance book. You are a living, breathing human being, dealing with real-life circumstances. Because of this, how you strengthen your connection after sex is constantly changing. It’s fluid – not set in stone.

315: Cleaning Up After Sex

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