“I am not perfect. Nor will I ever be. I am a work in progress.—Anonymous


Have you ever thought to yourself “I don’t know if I’m doing enough sexually or if I am enough for my spouse when it comes to our sexual intimacy”? 

Feeling as if you might not be doing enough is a common thought. 

It’s a question that can be laced with doubt and insecurity.

It’s also a question that can lead to feeling paralyzed or motivated.

During this last year you may have felt even more pressure to be even more for your spouse, your kids and your community. And very quickly, the “am I doing enough sexually” feelings pile up. 

What you might not realize is the antidote to your questions is in the action you decide to take. If you want to challenge the feelings of hopelessness you have to make a point to take action to remedy what’s blocking you.

Think for a moment about the last time you wondered “if”. You more than likely took action to find out “if” that was something you could do or have. That’s because if you don’t know something to be a possibility, you know you have to take action to find out. 

The sexual intimacy pillar is no different. It doesn’t have to be an all or nothing proposition. It’s also not something that you “have to be born with” or you’re out of luck.

You can develop the sexual intimacy in your marriage when you are willing to take action. If you have to break free of the “am I doing enough” questions in your head. 

There is no magic pill, no fairy dust, nothing that changes this cycle overnight.

It’s a commitment to getting past the comfortability of the situation to a place of action.

Start the conversation. Ask what your spouse’s vision is for your sexual intimacy and then share what yours are. By starting a conversation, you are saying you want your future to be different. It starts with you doing something different and inviting your spouse into that space.

140: Scheduling Sex

636: Comparison is Dangerous

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