663: ORAL SEX — CUNNILINGUS AND FELLATIO
“Oral sex can be foreplay, the main course or the dessert!” —Anonymous
Oral sex is one of those areas of sexual intimacy that lots of people think about but no one talks about.
Just to be clear: Oral sex is any sexual activity in which you stimulate your spouse’s genitals with your mouth. You may have also heard it referred to as cunnilingus and fellatio.
Many times sexual activity is limited to what’s done with your hands or with your genitals only. There can be a lot of stigma and even some negative connotation for folks around the idea of cunnilingus and fellatio.
In some cases, even having a conversation around the subject can be an area that’s avoided altogether.
Why?
Some people feel that this is an absolutely NO go while others are all for it. In some marriages it might also be a one way street and others make it a couple thing.
Oral sex can be a great tool for any marriage. And yet this is one of those areas within sexual intimacy that doesn’t just happen.
You need to talk about what you would like to try and if oral sex is not part of your marriage toolbox… why isn’t it?
You might want to start by exploring what’s keeping you from this experience.
It could be something as simple as hygiene or position.
For instance it’s much easier to think about putting your mouth on a body part that has been recently cleaned.
No matter where you may be, it starts with a conversation.
For some of you this is going to be a brand new conversation. For others you may need a mindset shift.
Either way you will want to answer these questions individually and together. These are:
- What are your thoughts on oral sex?
- What has kept you from trying?
- Are there concerns you have around cunnilingus and fellatio?
- What are the things that the two of you need to think about?
It’s these conversation starters that will begin to open and get the dialog around this not so talked about subject. You can get started when you pick up our 19 Questions to Amazing Sex.
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