“People cannot live up to expectations they don’t know have been set for them.—Rory Vaden

unvoiced expectation

Sometimes, husbands and wives become extremely frustrated with one another.

The frustration can take many forms and yet some things you may have heard and said are…

  • “I can’t believe that he/she did that (or didn’t do that).”
  • “Well, I didn’t know that this was important to you.”
  • “How could you not know that? I would think by now you’d know me well enough to know that I’d want that.”

Unvoiced expectations continue to be a source of tension in marriage.

Everything flows from your ability and willingness to communicate your thoughts, feelings and desires both verbally and non-verbally. 

When it comes to the expectations that the two of you have, sharing them verbally (spoken or written) is the only way to go because people cannot live up to expectations they don’t know have been set for them.

All of us have expectations. Big/small, it doesn’t matter. They’re there and when they are not addressed and discussed, all kinds of yucky emotions come to the surface.

Insecurity, feeling ignored, loneliness may pop up. Feelings of insignificance or even resentment creep forward.

When they are allowed to sit and aren’t dealt with, the disconnect grows and you might find yourselves dealing with other things like anger, impatience and more.

But why does this happen in the first place? There are many things that make this happen, from the logistics of your life to even the fear of being rejected. 

When you can understand what causes them to be unvoiced, then you can add in strategies to overcome this. You can get to a place of solving the problem of unvoiced expectations.

Emotion Wheel

The Power of Positive Thinking

ONE Family Private Facebook Group

511: Chore Wars

EPISODE SPONSOR | The 6 Pillars of Intimacy®: The Secret to an Extraordinary Marriage

Is it really possible to rekindle the spark and restore the “like-new” connection in your marriage?

In the 6 Pillars of Intimacy®, you will discover secrets that have transformed countless marriages. Its ideas are simple, practical, and powerful. You’ll be inspired to look at your marriage through a new lens and be encouraged by its commonsense approach.

Alisa and Tony DiLorenzo's proven approach to building intimacy in marriage will help you experience deeper and richer levels of intimacy with your spouse – starting today. Click HERE to get your copy today!

Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are “affiliate links.” This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, we will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, we only recommend products or services we use personally and believe will add value to our readers. We are disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

Medical Disclaimer: The content of this article & website is provided for general informational purposes only and is not intended as, nor should it be considered a substitute for, professional medical advice. Do not use the information on this website for diagnosing or treating any medical or health condition. If you have or suspect you have a medical problem, promptly contact your professional healthcare provider.