739: ROMANCE ISN’T DEAD

“There is no shame in being romantic. I think people want to feel that sense of romance which is rarely even attempted anymore.” —Colin Treverrow

Romance doesn’t have to end in your marriage when you say, “I do.” But for many couples, lack of romance is a huge challenge.

Think back to the excitement of first getting to know your spouse. What memories bring a smile to your face? Those moments were probably characterized by intentionality, thoughtfulness, and excitement. 

Romance can come easily in the early years of dating and marriage. Then, romance seems to die.

The responsibilities of life push romance to the back burner in your marriage. Eventually, you lose the anticipation and curiosity of romance and replace it with routine. 

Romance is defined as a feeling of excitement and mystery associated with love.

When was the last time you felt that excitement and mystery? For many couples, it’s been a long time. 

But romance isn’t dead. 

You have the power to create excitement and mystery in your marriage. In fact, all it takes is intentionality and action. 

To get started, take inspiration from the ways members of the ONE Family say they like to be romanced. 

For example, many people enjoy romantic communication, such as love notes or sexy texts, deep conversations, and having their spouse whisper sweet sayings in their ear.

Some ideas for romance may lead to sexual intimacy, such as a make-out session, slow dancing together, wearing nice lingerie, or lighting candles in the bedroom. 

Simple things, like buying flowers or remembering something your spouse likes, can go a long way. On the other hand, activities that require more thought, such as a fully planned date day or a surprise getaway, are also meaningful. 

Think about ways to romance your spouse that will stir up excitement, anticipation, and mystery for them. 

Then, take action. 

Simply turn these romance ideas into incredible dates that strengthen your marriage. 

Remember that the activity is not the most important part. Instead, what matters is that you make your spouse feel seen, loved, and valued. 

For instance, you can keep things simple by setting aside a night to cook together while sipping wine and listening to music. Ask a relative to watch the kids so you can enjoy an evening alone together.

Dates can help you explore your city. For example, plan a date to your local museum or zoo. Or research a fun or fancy restaurant that your spouse would love. 

If you want to spend time with your spouse in nature, go on a sunset walk, enjoy a picnic, or go camping.

Go the extra mile by planning a surprise trip out of town. Or propose something adventurous like skydiving!

The options for increasing romance in your marriage are endless. For more date ideas, get instant access to Our Bucket List for Dates.  

It’s time to prioritize romance in your marriage. Romance affects most (if not all) of The 6 Pillars of Intimacy®. So it’s too important to ignore. 

Start looking for ways to foster excitement and mystery in your marriage. With effort and intentionality, you can revitalize romance in your marriage and reconnect with your spouse like you did in the early days of your relationship. 

Resources

Our Bucket List of Dates

Connect with Us

Join the ONE Family private Facebook group to share your story and connect with other couples who are creating extraordinary marriages. To reach us on the Hug Hotline, call or text 858-876-5663 or email hugs@oneextraordinarymarriage.com.