862: Marriage Advice

“Marriage is not a noun, it’s a verb. It’s not something you get, it’s something you do. It’s the way you love your spouse every day.” —Barbara DeAngelis

Would you take your own marriage advice?

Recently, we asked couples in the ONE Family to share: What marriage advice would you give your newlywed selves to build an extraordinary marriage?

The responses were honest, heartfelt, and full of wisdom. Some were classic reminders, while others were refreshingly creative:

• Really listen (not just plan your response)
• Pray together regularly
• Prioritize sex, even in busy seasons
• Seek out marriage mentors
• Invest in special trips or date nights
• Flirt like you did when you first met
• Work on yourself before trying to change your spouse

The list went on and on.

But here’s the truth: Marriage advice isn’t just for couples who are newly engaged or recently married. Whether you’ve been married for 30 days or 30 years, there’s always room to learn from others who’ve walked a different path.

At its core, marriage advice often comes from a desire to help others avoid hard lessons. Sometimes, the goal is to inspire others to take action to achieve something extraordinary.

Either way, advice without action is simply hot air.

So the question is: Are you actually putting the wisdom you hear into practice?

If so, here are three practical ways to apply some of the top marriage advice right now:

Best Marriage Advice #1: Schedule Weekly Check-Ins

Set aside 30-45 minutes every week for an uninterrupted conversation about your relationship. This isn’t a time for logistics. Instead, talk about your feelings, expectations, or any concerns you have for your marriage. Put it on your calendar like any other important appointment, and consider using a tool like The 6 Pillars of Intimacy® Monthly Planner (which includes our Coffee Break template).

Best Marriage Advice #2: Find Marriage Mentors

Think of a couple you respect who’s been married longer than you and ask if they’d be open to mentoring you. Schedule regular coffee dates or dinners with them to learn from their experiences. If you can’t find mentors personally, join Intimacy Mastery, where you’ll connect with couples in the ONE Family who’ve been married 5 to 50+ years.

Best Marriage Advice #3: Cast a Shared Vision

Sit down together and write out your dreams and goals for the next 1, 5, and 10 years. Consider everything from travel plans to parenting to how you want to grow together. Use The 6 Pillars of Intimacy® as your guide for creating a vision that excites both of you.

Here’s the thing: Some of us never received marriage advice before tying the knot.

When we got married, there was no Instagram, no TikTok, and no marriage podcasts to guide us through challenges. YouTube didn’t exist. Neither did smartphones.

But today, things are different.

Resources, tools, and communities like Intimacy Mastery are right at your fingertips, ready to help you build the extraordinary marriage you desire.

So take a moment to talk with your spouse: What advice would you give your younger selves? Then don’t just talk about it. Live it out.

Because no one can build your extraordinary marriage for you.

Resources

Join Intimacy Mastery Today

The 6 Pillars of Intimacy Monthly Planner

Connect with Us

Join the ONE Family private Facebook group to share your story and connect with other couples who are creating extraordinary marriages. To reach us on the Hug Hotline, call or text 858-876-5663 or email hugs@oneextraordinarymarriage.com.