930: Quiet Quitting Your Marriage
“Silence doesn’t always mean peace. Sometimes it means someone has stopped trying.” —Anonymous
Silence in a marriage can seem like peace. But sometimes it means a husband or wife has stopped believing anything will change.
Quiet quitting your marriage happens when you remain physically present and continue handling the responsibilities of married life, but emotionally disengage from your spouse. You stop asking for affection, conversation, dates, help, or sexual intimacy because you no longer expect a response.
The marriage may appear calmer from the outside. Inside, the two spouses can be having very different experiences.
One believes they are going through a difficult season. The other believes the marriage has been dying for years.
Watch the Full Episode
In this episode of the ONE Extraordinary Marriage Show, Tony and Alisa discuss how quiet quitting shows up in both husbands and wives, why fewer arguments do not always mean things are improving, and how unresolved cracks in any of The 6 Pillars of Intimacy® can lead to deeper disconnection.
You’ll also hear why both spouses need to engage at the same time and how a marriage coach can help translate what each spouse has been trying to say.
Your 6 Pillars Episode Takeaways
- Silence does not always mean the problem has been resolved. It may mean one spouse has stopped trying.
- Quiet quitting can begin with a crack in any of the 6 Pillars of Intimacy®, not only Emotional Intimacy.
- Identify the Pillar where you have stopped talking, asking, touching, sharing, or spending time together.
- Re-engagement requires both spouses to take action at the same time.
- Your next chapter can continue the marriage you already have rather than beginning a separate story.
Your Action This Week
Consider each of the 6 Pillars of Intimacy® and ask yourself:
Which Pillar have I become silent around?
Identify what you have stopped discussing and why. Then ask your spouse one question that can help the two of you begin engaging in that area again.
If the silence has grown too wide to cross on your own, marriage coaching can help you identify the primary crack, understand one another more clearly, and decide what to do next.
Learn more and apply at ONEExtraordinaryMarriage.com/coaching.
Resources
The 6 Pillars of Intimacy® Certified Coaching Program
Connect with Us
Join the ONE Family private Facebook group to share your story and connect with other couples who are creating extraordinary marriages. To reach us on the Hug Hotline, call or text 858-876-5663 or email hugs@oneextraordinarymarriage.com.
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