There are many ways to communicate your love to your spouse.

How to Write a Romantic Love Letter

You can share your love verbally, physically, with gifts, by serving them, or you can write them a romantic love letter that will make their heart sing with joy.

The first three ideas happen in a moment in time and then fade away. Romantic love letters can last forever in a shoe box or a special place you and your spouse have for them.

These romantic love letters are also a legacy that you are leaving for you later in life, your kids and your grandchildren.

Think about what they will be saying about your love for one another when you share these with them when they are older. What a blessing.

We have a shoe box with many romantic love letters and cards that we have given to one another since we first met.

These letters and cards bring back memories of your married life at a specific moment in time and reveal your emotional love for each other.

4 Steps to Writing a Romantic Love Letter

Put down your computer, phone, tablet, or any other electronic device. You are going to go old school. That’s right, you’ll be writing a handwritten romantic love letter to your spouse today. In 4 easy steps you’ll have a letter that you can be proud of and one that will be cherished for years to come.

Set aside 30 minutes to complete this process the first couple of times. As you get better at writing romantic love letters you’ll be able to write these quicker.


1. Inspirational Ideas

This first step is all about brainstorming your inspirational ideas in a free flow manner. There is no right or wrong when it comes to this. What you want to do is get your ideas down so that when it is time to write you won’t get stuck. Grab a sheet of paper and pen. Decide on one aspect of your spouse that you love to write about.

These can be:

  • Smile/Eyes
  • Rockin’ body
  • Where you met
  • Generous spirit
  • Sexy talk
  • Love making
  • Time apart from each other
  • Provider
  • Spiritual leader

After you have decided on the one area you want to write about you now need to write down 3-6 descriptive action words that highlight this area. For example if you picked “your smile”, the descriptive words could be dimples, plump, rosy red, kissing, touching, etc.  These are the descriptive/action words that excite you, make your heart sing, and has your heart beating.

2. Be Transparent (Share from Your Heart)

Writing a romantic love letter is a perfect opportunity for you to open up and be transparent about your love for your spouse. You are digging deep into your emotions as you put yourself out there to your spouse. Let your emotions flow onto each sheet of paper.  These words are an extension of you and your deep feelings for your lover.

3. Structuring Your Letter

It’s easiest if you have a formula you follow when writing your romantic love letter. The reason is that the easier it is to write the more you’ll write. More importantly in your busy life if we can get you to write a letter in 30 minutes think how awesome that would be. You can find 30 minutes once a month to write your beloved a romantic love letter, right?

The first paragraph is going to be wrapped around the main inspirational idea you had above. Write 3-4 sentences that describe what you love about this aspect of your spouse. Again our example is “your smile”. Your first paragraph could be:

As I wake up each morning your smile is the first thing that catches my eyes. Your smile is like the sun rising and brings a new day to my life. It lifts my spirit as I begin a new day with you by my side knowing that I have an amazing wife/husband.

After you have written the first paragraph you’ll now pick 2-3 descriptive/action words that you have on your brainstorming sheet. The second, third, and forth paragraphs are going to take these descriptive/action words, which you will expand to share with your spouse “why” you appreciate this aspect of their lives.  We’re not going to write out the whole letter as we know that you can do it on your own. 😉

4. Patience & Practice

Writing a romantic love letter is going to take some patience and practice. Don’t get discouraged if you don’t write the perfect love letter the first handful of times.

The more you apply yourself to writing romantic love letters the easier it will become. Be committed to the process of writing one love letter each month and you will grow as a romantic love letter writer.

It’s Doable, Right?

Take the motivation you have right now to start your first romantic love letter to your spouse. Set your timer, brainstorm your idea, be transparent, structure your letter, and practice. As you apply yourself more and more you are going to impact your marriage for the better. You and your spouse are going to glad you did.

When you’re emotionally intimate with your spouse this can lead to many breakthroughs for the two of you.

Watch the video below to rekindle the spark and restore the connection in your marriage today!

In the 6 Pillars of Intimacy®, you will discover secrets that have transformed countless marriages. Its ideas are simple, practical, and powerful. You’ll be inspired to look at your marriage through a new lens and be encouraged by its commonsense approach.

Alisa and Tony DiLorenzo's proven approach to building intimacy in marriage will help you experience deeper and richer levels of intimacy with your spouse – starting today. Click HERE to get your copy today!

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