“Money is an opportunity to reach unity in marriage. When couples work together they can do anything.” —Anonymous
When you come together in marriage, that doesn’t mean everything becomes unified except finances.
Maybe you have bad credit history, debt or poor budgeting skills. Maybe you don’t know how much your spouse makes, or where your money goes. At the simplest level, it is factual. It is just a number. But if we leave it there, you will set yourselves up for a lot of trouble – because it’s also a highly emotional topic.
What does bringing your finances together mean to you and your spouse?
It’s possible the two of you have different views on money. How central is it to your daily life? What is the motivation behind your money goals? No two people are identical and there will be differences.
Money can represent:
- Influence (the house you live in, the car you drive, the zip code you live in, the way you socialize)
- Security (independence, comfort, relief)
- Ability (host people for meals, vacations, dreams, kid activities)
Sit down and ask yourself – what is your relationship with money? How transparent am I with my spouse about this? Would you consider using your credit report as a marriage tool?
Yes, we’re saying you have to be accountable to someone else (your spouse). Rather than stuffing financial conversations into the closet, shift your thinking to ask yourself, “how can I honor my spouse in how I handle money?”.
This issue may likely be the hardest part of becoming one for some of you. But it’s truly an opportunity to become unified with your finances and your financial intimacy.
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