“Most people fail not because of a lack of desire, but because of a lack of commitment.” —Vince Lombardi
In the series “Our Marriage Vows” we are stripping away all of the circumstantial topics that get put onto marriages, and diving deep into the core of what marriage is. Maybe you’re like Alisa who, on her wedding day, said her vows as a formality — because she was excited to get to the good stuff — the party. What she has realized and wishes she knew then was the vows WERE the “good stuff”.
In Part 5 “As long as life shall last”, we explore how the commitment of marriage exceeds everything before death.
Think about the paper plate you used for pizza on the sidelines of the soccer field. You used it for a purpose and tossed it. There are millions just like it. Now compare that to the finest china passed down to you by your great-great grandmother; your expectations and commitment to that plate far exceed comparison. This is intended to be the difference between your relationship with your spouse and other relationships.
You purposefully, in your vows, said that this is NOT a disposable relationship. You don’t toss your great-great grandmother’s china in the trash because the fashionable colors have changed. So, hang onto your spouse, and not just until someone more interesting comes along.
We’ve called the divorce attorneys. We remember how dark that season in our marriage felt. We weren’t even thinking about our vows, they hardly seemed relevant. Alisa had the thoughts that marriage was so hard she’d rather try to be a single mom.
If you are there, even now, things can change.
If you are considering divorce for “irreconcilable differences”, you’re not giving up on your spouse, or your marriage. You’re failing to honor yourself and your word. People of character say what they mean and mean what they say.
You said your vows however long ago – that’s great. But now what are you saying in the legacy of marriage that you are leaving?
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